…you become an idealistic, determined, wanton, creative, annoyed person.
I’m tired of people asking me, “how’s business?” You really want to know about business? I feel totally inept some days. Other days I feel like a superhero. The day after that, I wonder if I’ve lost my mind, because for the 10th time in 3 hours my mom asks me, “are you okay, honey?” No, no I’m not ok, mommy. I just told you, I’m an idealistic, determined, wanton, creative, annoyed person. You become so much of the “determined, wanton, creative, annoyed” part that you don’t even see yourself as idealistic. Who has time for that when i have real issues in my life? But yeah, I get it. You’re still a little idealistic underneath what life covers up.
Then it gets worse. You can’t go back. Well, you could and you’ve thought about it, and who would blame you if you did? But you don’t. I’m supposed to be the poster child for living out dreams. I’m supposed to put memes on Instagram that inspire you, when really what I want to do is jolt you—make you think differently about your idea than ever before, expand your vision and scope of the idea or business or whatever the hell you are meant to do.
Doing the work of an idealistic annoyed is a pain and I don’t recommend it. The funny thing is, we (The Idea, Inc. Folks) happen to work with people who couldn’t care less if anyone recommends it, because they’re doing it anyway.
The truth is, you’ve gone too far now. You have to keep moving forward—to dig deeper for more (fill in the word I can’t seem to think of) in order to move forward. The word isn’t inspiration, because if you are who I think you are, you’ve been inspired to death. Motivation doesn’t work. I’m trying to expand people’s view of business ’round here. I couldn’t be more motivated if I tried.
There is a word, and Idon’t know what it is for you, that pushes you to keep going past the place on the path where you should have taken that job offer, should have gone back to school, should have taken the sabbatical or done the guest professor gig, but there’s that thing, that word again.
Some choose to stop on the path. The marathon turned into 191.3 miles, so no one blamed you when you jumped on another path. My hat goes off to you, sir. Others will still walk down the unbeaten path because it’s really all they could do anyway.
Is this what you really want to do? Finding out the “this” is the least of your worries. You and I both know, you know what it is. The question to ask yourself is, “do I—me, the person I have to look at every day—really feel that thing I can’t find the word to, the push to do the this?”
I believe people know what their purpose/passion/”real work”/vocation/”fake job,” whatever you choose to call it, is already. I just think people choose to ignore it. It may be too close to see, but you know it.
Either way, keep banging on the door.
An idealistic annoyed
P.s. You might bang softer than the next idealistic annoyed. Noelani did. She doesn’t like to be the center of attention, so she wouldn’t dare bang on the door too loud, but somehow she gets in anyway. One day before even the awful government job, she had to do the thing that most of us would die before doing.